Masturbation is normal, healthy activity that has both physical and psychological benefits and it is not something to feel guilty about. Surprisingly, most people feel embarrassed, guilty, or even ashamed when talking about masturbation. Rather, there should be no shame in pleasuring yourself. However, it is possible to masturbate to excess. If you feel like masturbation is affecting other parts of your life, it might be worth reflecting on just how much you do it.
It is a common practice not only among men but also among women of all ages. According to one study, more men than women report lifetime masturbation; also, men report more frequent masturbation as compared to women (Gerressu et al., 2008; Herbenick et al., 2010; Oliver & Hyde, 1993; Petersen & Hyde, 2011).
As the practice is something quite personal and private, in India it is considered a taboo and not much talked about- even among our closest friends. Therefore, it is not surprising that it brings along various myths related to it.
From the old rumour that masturbating causes blindness to the suggestion that men in relationships don’t do it, these myths differ wildly. Hence, it is worth busting some of the major myths about masturbation.
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Myth: Masturbating “N” number of times a week/month/year is bad for you
If you are not inflicting physical harm on yourself while practicing or getting off the track from your life in a negative way, i.e., not able to focus on your work/ getting distracted at work/ missing your work due to urge to practice, then masturbate as many times as you please. Many of my patients often ask “I am masturbating twice a day or this much number of times a day. Is it alright?”
Fact: There is no magical number that you should or should not reach. The need of one person may vary from the other. The best rule to follow is the one that's applicable to most things in life: Too much of anything isn't good for you.
Tip: Try and clear your doubt with a healthcare professional as to what makes you ask the question about the number of times in a day. There is need to work on underlying fear behind the activity with the therapist.
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Myth: Men are the only ones who masturbate
It is easy to believe this outdated myth. It is not gender biased.
Fact: We have some news for you: Women do masturbate! Oh, and in case you were not aware, trans and gender non-conforming people masturbate too. Orgasms are for everyone!
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Myth: If you masturbate when you are in a relationship, it means something is wrong with your relationship.
Facts: Masturbation help your sex life; it can teach you what you like and what you don’t like so that you can share the information with your partner. In some relationships, levels of sexual desires of the partners are different and masturbation can help relieve some of the pressure to engage in sex.
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Myth: It will Shrink My Penis
Whilst some believe that masturbating increases testosterone, others think that the decrease in the male hormone after ejaculation causes your penis to shrink.
Fact: However, testosterone levels simply have no bearing on your penis size. If this were true, your penis would diminish if you had a lot of sex too. Rather, your size is a genetic thing, whilst the size of your erection is dependent upon your lifestyle, health, and state of mind too.
Tip: Avoid smoking and consuming alcohol regularly as it has a bearing
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Myth: Masturbation Makes Me Infertile
Many people hold the belief that masturbation affects their sperm count and it also impacts the quality of sperm.
Fact: Masturbation normally does not have any significant effect on your sperm count. The testicles continually produce sperm – and one gets topped up again soon after ejaculating. Pleasuring yourself does not affect the health of your sperm, either. Whilst masturbation has no relation to sperm count.
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Myth: Masturbation Cause Erectile Dysfunction
One of the most strongly held myths about masturbation is that it can cause erectile dysfunction (ED). That is often thought to be because, after ejaculation, it takes a little time before men can achieve an erection again.
Fact: However, this has nothing to do with your long-term ability to get the erection. Rather, the recovery time after ejaculation is something that is completely normal. One will be able to get an erection again soon afterwards – usually within twenty minutes.
Something that can cause a type of ED, however, is excessive use of pornography. Sometimes, pornography can give men false expectations of what sex is – and so they struggle during a normal sexual encounter. This is sometimes known as performance anxiety.
Tip: One needs to take the professional help if struggling with arousal or ability to sustain the arousal.
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Myth: There are no Benefits to Masturbating
It is far from true that masturbation does nothing good for you at all.
Fact: Masturbation has many physical and mental health benefits. Few studies focus specifically on the benefits of masturbation which states that it-
- Reduces stress
- Enhance sleep quality
- Boost concentration
- Elevate mood
- Relieve menstrual cramps
- Improve sex
When you have an orgasm, your body releases endorphins, which are hormones that block pain and make you feel good," That orgasm also releases dopamine and helps you sleep better.
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Myth: There is Right Way to Masturbate
Fact: There is no right or wrong way to masturbate. One may use own hands or their favourite sex toy. There are no fixed rules that you should follow except ensuring good hygiene.
One of the beauties of pleasuring yourself sexually is that you can decide what works best for you – and what you enjoy the most.
Tip: So, follow the urge and see what you like.
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Myth: It is sinful activity
People who believe that masturbation conflicts with their religious, spiritual, or cultural beliefs tends to experience feelings of guilt. Many of my patients in the OPD often comes with the belief and states that “masturbation is sinful and since they have engaged in this activity and they will be punished by god”. In the research articles, it has been found that solo masturbation is prohibited in some religions which often lead to internal conflict related to desires to masturbate (Bullough, 2003; Chowdhury et al., 2019; Hungrige, 2016).
Fact: However, masturbation is not immoral or wrong, and self-pleasure is not shameful.
Tip: Discussing feelings of guilt with a healthcare professional, or therapist that specializes in sexual health might help a person to resolve feelings of guilt or shame that they connect with masturbation.
Take Away
Any misconception is a shame, as it can stop people from enjoying benefits of masturbation. Masturbation is something we need to feel comfortable talking about more. Parents must talk with their children especially around the time when their children are attaining puberty. It helps their children receive correct information from their parents. As receiving information from peers and social media may give them inadequate information. Age-appropriate knowledge about the body’s sexual function can reduce shame around sexuality and prepare people to make right choices regarding their sexual health.
Have doubts and apprehension regarding the same? Contact the healthcare professional to seek help and enhance your sexual health.
Contact the sex therapist, who are specialised in the intervention of various sexual dysfunctions kritikasuri08@gmail.com or 9999609935